Sunday, July 02, 2006

Why Nigerian Men marry European Women

I came across this article at this site and tears almost came to my eyes when I read it. (the error in numbering is hers and not mine).

I’m an Irish woman and have worked in a refugee centre as a paralegal for five years representing asylum seekers to remain in Ireland. In my time served in this field I have learned the main reasons as to why they marry European Union nationals and it is as follows.

Ten reasons why Nigerian men marry European women (please note this does not include those with full refugee status recognition, doctors, engineers, or those who have ordinarily been resident in an European Union member state for at least five years):

1. Stronger legal basis to remain in the European Union.

2. More freedom to move i.e. change jobs, travel

3. To qualify for European Union fees in colleges etc.

3. To appear to be more successful.

4. More time spent in state will be taken into consideration.

5. To gain citizenship of that country with a view to moving to another European Union member state upon receipt of same.

6. Easier to meet people, easier to integrate,

7. Cannot receive a deportation order and much less likely to warrant the attention of the authorities.

8. Use a white woman, milk her, give her ‘milky’ babies and make mince meat of her for five years for everything she has.

9. Trying a white woman an getting the things that an African lady wouldn’t do in bed although I wouldn’t either but most would (talking bj’s etc) only beauty in white women is things like this.

10. Finally, to have Nigerians when you go home on holidays (especially when choosing a wife) kissing the ground you walk on because you live in Europe people will fling themselves in desperation at you. So overall you get a higher status. What an honour, thanks silly white woman! Job well done!!!!! Now I can go and make my twelve kids, real kids that isPersonally if it was done to me, there will be heads rolling!Then again I know what tribe is more fond of this type of behaviour! together with the uneducated. (Sorry blue eyed Britney nice try but a white man would appreciate you more!)

Yasmeen.

To appear more successful? WTF? My reaction is in two parts. One would be to the bastard sellout Nigerian men (in the minority I pray) who have given this ignorant woman the reason to write this stupid article. I must admit I've missed my true vocation in life and that should have been to work in the British High Commission in Nigeria as the Senior Visa officer. I believe this must be an issue of lack of education primarily so if you don't have at least a OND (ordinary national diploma, as issued after 2 years of study at a College of Technology in Nigeria) you would need to give me some serious reason to let your ass leave the shores of the country.

Secondly this stupid Yasmeen woman that despite her five years of paralegal work is still unable to count. Unless I missed it somewhere did this biatch mention love? In a top ten list? What gives her the audacity to feel superior to Nigerians? Call it 'reverse' racism if you will, but this is why I won't even date a white girl talk less of marrying one. Like Eddie Murphy said "my soul belongs to the black race". Oya lets us dedicate the next five minutes to rain epe (curses) on Yasmeen's head!

267 comments:

1 – 200 of 267   Newer›   Newest»
chrome said...

interesting website.

what she says is true for some people. I've had boys come over from naija and head on to Ireland. always with one thing in mind and they normally succeed.

I have a problem with her notion that her list is definitive. how about for love?

Lowla said...

Wow!!!
Might be true for some but definitely not all of them, so she should not generalize.
Yeah Obi has a point.. Of all the points she made, she did not include marrying for love.. WOW.
So Naija man no fit fall in love again.. *nods head*
BTW that was an interesting website. Something to read when I get bored at work 2day.. thanks.

nikki said...

da hell?!?

unfortunately, those things hold true for some people, although it's ridiculous of her to assume it's like that for everyone.

if something like that had been published here in the u.s., folk would be in an uproar.

Aramide said...

MY DEAR...it is more true than not, yes a lot of them marry for love but believe me, imagine loving one and then thinking youll get all those benefits...WONT YOU LOVE HER EVEN MORE....love is not even the yardstick for matrimony anymore. Actually you've inspired me to blog abt sumthin xx

toometoblog said...

she isn't exactly lying. put aside our national pride (and epes) for a moment we have to admit that this is one of our biggest exports :)

culturalmiscellany said...

I understand how she got that impression. It may not be true of the whole but it may be true of the ones she has encountered.

I have questioned myself many times about peoples motives for dating me because unfortunately public opinion, such as that you posted, can be true and one is wise to be careful in whatever relationship you enter into.

However, assuming a man of one colour or race is more likely to hurt you than the next is very naiive!

Nneka's World said...

HahaLOL!!!!!!
I thought she was taking the piss at first.
Unfortunately she is right, there are men who think like that. Very sad

ayoke said...

Kush, Kush, Kush, please don't rain epe on her, abeg. There are many like that but it's a shame to generalise.

Aramide said...

Hi Kush Kush, pls Check out the forum I currently have going on my blog for a week. xxx

adefunke said...

No need to get all swollen in the chest. I used to believe interracial marriages involving Nigerian men/women and Europeans/Americans was split 50-50 on the love issue, now I am not so sure. I have lived in the US now 4 weeks and in that time I have not met one interracial couple involving a Nigerian who didn't do it for all the reasons in the world except love. I have met 2 guys who divorced their wives in Nigeria so they could remarry here and arrange papers, another one came in two years ago and recently married a cute mexican (for pali) my hosts attended a wedding today, same deal. The list goes on and on. I am sure that some people actually marry for love, now however I am inclined to believe that the percentage is a lot less than 50 percent.

Unknown said...

kush, u may want to rain curses on her head but unfortunately she's telling the truth. The average immigrant in europe or america not necesarily nigerian is on the lookout for a citizen to get married to and receive that initial 5yr permit. It does make life easier than looking over ur shoulder all the time. The citizens heart gets broken after 5yrs years cos mr immigrant will certainly take a walk when he is in the clear. Milky babies or no milky babies!! Its horrible but thats the situation on ground whether we like to see it that way or not.

internationalhome said...

I must agree with most on here. National sentiment aside, it is true that a good percentage of Niger guys are marrying "oyinbo" girls for papers. They know the Nigerian girls with british passports will not be as easy! i personally know about three boys who started uni with my and are getting married next year...whilst at uni and without parental consent...something they dare not try in Niger! what can we do?

internationalhome said...

Oh i forgot to mention..none of them are marrying for love!

Anonymous said...

look, I am the lady who posted this article in anger. There are VERy few Nigerian men who find love with a white woman. There are many white women who really do want to find and be in love FOREVER with these men. Unfortunately this cannot happen because the Nigeiran man has to go off on vacation without his wife wheneverhe pleases which a western woman wont accapt, she also cant malke fresh soup every day there are so many things. its the Nigerian man who can only accept naija culture and who wont compromise and who becuase of his papers. thats why.

whitejellybeaner said...

I found your observations fascinating. I find many parallels between the Nigerian men that marry white European women with alien men from Uranus that marry white European women. The motivation for both is self-serving and does not include romance or love. As with Nigerians, men from Uranus are too worshiped for having caught a white woman. It elevates their status as Uranusianuses. It gives men a sense of accomplishment on Uranus to have such a prize. It seems to be a great solution to marry a white European woman. In fact white women are so versatile, next time you get a flat tire on the free way slap a white woman on it and it should get you to the next gas station at least. Or if your hoover goes out, attach the hose to a white woman, because they apparently can suck like the dickens. You think very much like the people on Uranus. I believe you must have your heart on Earth, but your head in Uranus.

Loveniger said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Loveniger said...

Hey Yasmeen. I'm responding to your comment. Why Nigerian Men marry European Women. Stop misleading people with your useless comment. I live in europe myself. First I prefer to change your article title to Why blacks marry whites, the answer is very simple its because black girls are very few and black men also. The white girls run after the black men and the white men also run after the the black girls, so the the blacks find it very difficult to befriend a fellow black because the whites have occupied there position, so the blacks have no choice than to befriend the white because they are plenty. OK men.

Anonymous said...

"I came across this article at this site and tears almost came to my eyes when I read it"

WTF??? WHY EVEN BOTHER?

What a waste of time reposting this nonsense... You and this blog SUCKS!!

Anonymous said...

i must condem this notion that nigerian men marry for the right to stay in eu that in my view is very demeaning and arogant to say things of that nature.
first and formost i reject that comment right away, as far as am aware you have marriage break up the highest among eu national than with nigerian men marrying eu nationals, 2 how come when things go wrong with marriage invovling nigerian its always the nigerian men at falt, that is very demeaning in my view because mby your notion every marriage involving your eu national breakup marriage then what is the problem?
so i would expect u to do a job with an open mind and not be anti nigerian men, after all u dont see nigerian men beating there wifes in europe like your men do, you dont see nigerian running away from there responsibilities when it matters most, so pls choose your words carefully thanks

Anonymous said...

hi there.im an irish girl who had a nigerian boyfriend in another european country.once i told him i wouldn marry him he dumped me.overall this has left a negative opinion on my behalf with this topic!!!!

Anonymous said...

hi im 25 years old and im married to Nigerian man since 6 years now.We have 2 kids and we are happly married.Though i can speak pigin english and cook all nigerian foods especially delta state,igbo soups even better then many nigerian young women.im clever i finished universty and now im runing 2 export-import company in Nigeria and in Turkey with my husband.i have house in Nigeria and in Turkey.i was living in Nigeria and now im going back there to settle down fully.im very beautiful,friendly :) my husband is handsome and clever and lovely.SO WHY CANT WE BE TOGETHER JUST FOR LOVE? Hey sisters and brothers for God sake if you ever thinking about marying white women just for money or papers God will truly punish you someday.DONT EVER PLAY WITH SOMEONES FEELINGS.Money can come and go or you can have passaport of everycounty but God may not bless you with a good life or much money...so dont play play people feelings by marrying them to use.THX.Pinar Agboifo

Anonymous said...

Guys, I have an uncle who went to germany like an ordinary immigrant who didnt have any hope of living a better life, untill he met this white chick that came into his life. I must tell you that this gal made everything possible for him, included turning him to a citizen over there. First thing that came to my mind when i saw the way he loved her cos he always cald and told us about his lovely white gf and they are definitely getting married, i tot to my self that all was just lies that he was going to leave a soon, after getting watever he wanted. but 2ma surprised this guys have been living 2geda for like 17yrs now and they are married. I dont think some1 wuz after papers would stay dat long with a white lady. So i just couldnt do anything but to believe he actually loved her. Lets stop all this rubbish about naija guys goin there to use white galz to get papers.... most of them actually fall in love for real and they love this white galz like they would their naija gals. me as a person, i love interraccial marriage. if i have that opportunity i wouldnt mind having a white lady as my lovely wife. and again, i love that color a white and black produce (their kids) i would say they are the most beautiful creature nature has ever created. pls people thats wat i feel and like i dnt mean to hurt anybody. this world is gna be one color someday weda we like it or not. cheers!

Anonymous said...

I have recently started dating a Nigerian man. There is a lot of distance between us, I live in a small viallge in the north of England and he lives in London. Circumstances wont allow me to move to London for a long time but people round here are so racist and critical. I am trying hard to ignore comments but cant travel to London every weekend. I have never been treated so well and every opportunity he gets he comes up North to see me. Hopefully we will have a future but just wanted to say that some white British have a lot to learn.

Anonymous said...

It's not only white women Nigerian man falsely its BLACK women too. I'm Jamaican and met a nigerian man and became very familiar with the term mugoo whilst I was with only after he had received his papers to realise that that is what he had taken me for. It's just another form of 419 - the level of deceit and lies has stunned me and I'm not a child.

Anonymous said...

In every country in the world there are good and bad people,there are Nigerians who marry white ladies for papers and there are numerous who marry for love.Generalization is not a good thing,i totally disagree with the poster.I am a Nigerian presently dating a white Polish girl,i have a green card in America and planning to sponsor her to come to US after our marriage,what about that?

satinsgirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
satinsgirl said...

I really don't understand such stupid an ignorant ideas from everyone I run into. I read this all and my mouth hit the floor. I am a white woman not rich at all. I am a medical assistant and been married to a nigerian man for 13 years.He is a pharmacist. We met online along time ago and we been together since. Yes we do have a great and highly sexual life. He pleases me and then some. We have six children and expecting our seventh. He gives his whole heart. We had a conversation many years ago about some of the same bull that was written here. He has never thought about leaving me, he loves us to the bone and he definitly isn't after me for money. When he ask me to marry him. It was romantic and thought out. He suprised me with a two and half carat diamond ring and every year since he has been giving me diamonds and a kid..lol because he and I are real love. Being Nigerian isn't a bad thing its a great thing. So don't judge every one by a story online or in person. God gave people the ability to think and feel use them.

Anonymous said...

What do you expect. Nigger-ians especially Yoruban vermin are ugly stupid monkeys with average IQ of 67. All you gave the World is Voodoo, Ju-Ju and Witchdoctors.

Anonymous said...

u cant judge the book from the outside.. conclusion in 1 lot is kinda racist.

Unknown said...

...and what is the problem? Anybody, from any country, can choose to marry for many different reasons. This is nothing new. How many women have sought powerful men as husbands over the years? This smacks of sexism, racism, and ignorance.

******* said...

It's true that Nigerian men do more than others as probably more talked about marry/use EU women for status security residency. Not all men are the same.
Nigerian men though do like women who work or have status or good connections to make their life easier. Wouldn't most men?
Nigerian men cheat as do all men. Its the way the men are brought up.In Nigeria more common for men to have affairs and children by various women usually where the man in position of some power or rich and the wives have no choice but to accept it.The wives are either dependant or religious where divorce is ruled out.Therefore Nigerian think this is acceptable behaviour and hence choose women who are weak in a way or/and religious where they can do as they please in later years of marriage.
Nigerians especially the educated men see it as a requirement to have something extra other Nigerians dont to boost their status in eyes of fellow men.Pathetic really.


Rosa Folla

******* said...

It's true that Nigerian men do more than others as probably more talked about marry/use EU women for status security residency. Not all men are the same.
Nigerian men though do like women who work or have status or good connections to make their life easier. Wouldn't most men?
Nigerian men cheat as do all men. Its the way the men are brought up.In Nigeria more common for men to have affairs and children by various women usually where the man in position of some power or rich and the wives have no choice but to accept it.The wives are either dependant or religious where divorce is ruled out.Therefore Nigerian think this is acceptable behaviour and hence choose women who are weak in a way or/and religious where they can do as they please in later years of marriage.
Nigerians especially the educated men see it as a requirement to have something extra other Nigerians dont to boost their status in eyes of fellow men.Pathetic really.


Rosa Folla

Afro-man said...

Well i know for a fact the black guys for other countries marry white uk citizen a lot for papers. Sometimes guys want to settle down too. i know a guy who starting looking for a white buy for papers and also love. the truth is he was trying to use one stone to kill two birds. white girls are always atticted to a black man with a big strong you know what anyway, so it looks like we are all happy. Evenones got a motive, a woman regardless of race can dump you for not being paid, goodlooking or very outgoing.
For me, i am not insecure about who are i am or where am from. But i am a proud nigerian that finds white women very appealing.
since i have been in the uk i have had better times with white girl than black girl. Black girls have looked down on me for cash related reasons even though i am a computer network engineering student, but white girls have paid for my coach ticket to come spend a weekend with them.
i have very sincerely showed affection for some black girls, but it seems when black women get to the uk they change a little.

Also , i am not ashamed to say it. black women are very picky, i dont look like the greatest guy in the world, but i am very far from being ugly. what i found out is that white girls shard this veiw with me more than black girls if you know what i mean. so who would u love most, the one that loves you most or loves you less? my mind is made up. one nigerian girl invited me to church then suggested to escort me to the bus station cos i came late to a place i had never been before which she only just told me of 11:00pm the night before and i was supposed to be there 9:00am.
i dont know anymore. its bullshit that we seek white girls for papers. all the white girls i've know since coming here, i am still in very good talking terms with them. i find them different and i like them more. i feel a lot of black guys feel this way too. its all about doing what feels best for you.
As per what the owner of this thread was saying. Put it this way, i get a lot of white women up 20yrs older than me saying hi to me on dating websites. 60% of fat white girls now only want to date black guys cos black guys do not insist on being skinny the way white me do. It's up to us to judge ourselves. We should also ask white women why they marry black me. I know some marry for love , but still .............

Unknown said...

Well i know for a fact the black guys for other countries marry white uk citizen a lot for papers. Sometimes guys want to settle down too. i know a guy who starting looking for a white buy for papers and also love. the truth is he was trying to use one stone to kill two birds. white girls are always atticted to a black man with a big strong you know what anyway, so it looks like we are all happy. Evenones got a motive, a woman regardless of race can dump you for not being paid, goodlooking or very outgoing.
For me, i am not insecure about who are i am or where am from. But i am a proud nigerian that finds white women very appealing.
since i have been in the uk i have had better times with white girl than black girl. Black girls have looked down on me for cash related reasons even though i am a computer network engineering student, but white girls have paid for my coach ticket to come spend a weekend with them.
i have very sincerely showed affection for some black girls, but it seems when black women get to the uk they change a little. one invited me to church then suggested to escort me to the bus station cos i came late to a place i had never been before which she only just told me of 11:00pm the night before and i was supposed to be there 9:00am.
i dont know anymore. its bullshit that we seek white girls for papers. all the white girls i've know since coming here, i am still in very good talking terms with them. i find them different and i like them more. i feel a lot of black guys feel this way too. its all about doing what feels best for you.
As per what the owner of this thread was saying. Put it this way, i get a lot of white women up 20yrs older than me saying hi to me on dating websites. 60% of fat white girls now only want to date black guys cos black guys do not insist on being skinny the way white me do. It's up to us to judge ourselves. We should also ask white women why they marry black me. I know some marry for love , but still .............

Anonymous said...

Very true and accurate look at why many men from abroad marry Europeans, particularly if the mans native country has been colonialized by the particularly European country ie England, France, etc.
Have you read Fanon - Black Skin White mask ?

Afro-man. said...

part-one

firstly, I'm going to have to apologise for my previous post. I was a bit tipsy and too lazy to edit the post before posting. With regards to what to what the last poster has just said. That person is either a disgruntled person or a racist. once again, this is BS.
The notion that black men date whites because it gives them higher status is rubbish. i school here i cant better grades than many whites and they don't show superiority complex because they know different students will get different grades regardless or race. Black are rich and successful too. Thant the white race once enslave the black race does not make the white greater. for one they did not enslave all Africans and secondly slaver was the rape of the black continent. There is nothing there for the white to be proud of because blacks trusted them and the lied to the blacks. Man continues to lie to man. Just the way things go.

sometimes these relationships are nothing but mere racial experiments geared towards trying something new , only to reveal love in the process.

I swear talking to a white girl is so different from the black girls.I am not being a crazy for saying this. Everyone knows a white man does not mind coming on TV to talk about personal things. we criticise and see it all the time when we watch things like Murry but there's a positive in this some how. white people and women can be very nice and more open(that is of course they are not the typical businessman or politician). Its only in Europe that black and whites hate each other. when whites visit Africa they come back with good stories because they get a warm welcome.

For me, I've found white girls to be nicer. I will not lie cos I'm black . I had failed relationship with a black girl I dated for 3 because we did not communicate enough. well i talked a hole lot but it turns
out she did not really tell me her heart. That is just a single incident but I have use other experiences and that of others to Analise this topic more adeptly. But talking about it here is not needed. .The only power the black woman has now is that black men don't fancy western culture when it comes to marriage. The plague of divorce gives them fear. So out of an intrinsic need to have a higher chance of a divorce-free-marriage, they go for black women. I see no
other advantage. The truth is that Africans hardly ever divorce mostly because African culture disapproves of it. But African girls in UK will leave you and then come for your money. But that's not the case for all of them though. . So once again, what is the difference?

Afro-man. said...

part-two

Black women are a lot more guarded about their emotions and how they feel. FACT. A black women can act like she does not like you and she does. when she's ready to open up , by then you cant be
bothered anymore or her words becomes less valued because it makes you feel it was a hard choice. African women subscribe more to the view that its cheap to let a man unto how u feel .
but some men value a woman that comes to them more than a women that they go to. men like me.
I love being totally free when it comes to talking. i get so much of this from white girls.
I'm not saying that black women are less smart or appealing. I have seen many and their intelligence has humbled me. But one thing remains, white girls are more open. A black women does not like to give away any sign of vulnerability. To me that comes across as just too masculine. whilst its good to be strong, nobody has an emotional bullet proof vest.

I think when black women say that black guys have inferiority complex when they date white girls its just because they are upset- its called Bitching. They are upset because black women are less open to interracial dating than black men so they get upset when they see a black guy she would kill to date, hanging with a white girl. but that same black girl has turned away many black guys too. how does she know if that guy she is craving for has not been turn away be another black girl before? lets face the fact. black population in the united kingdom is less than 5%. If black girls want to moan and complain then they should put their hearts where their mouths is or just keep silent.

As for white women that have bad things to say about black guys. well maybe she was dating a guy she knows at the back of her mind would never date her under normal circumstances. Life can be harsh sometimes. so if you take him because of his lack of papers or passport, you are using him
to gratify your fantasy just as he is using you. you are not a naive child. I think these women should not get upset when things go wrong because were not living in reality anyway. So many older white women chasing black men. Fat white girls go black because most white guys say no and black guys have less of a problem with being overweight, and as a result treat them better. I would love to take that last statement back because i have a some overweight friends who are incredibly warm and decent people . Its not their fault since they are not God, but for some other white women , there is truth in what I just said. Everyone wakes up from a dream. It must hurt and i hate to say it, but hey, such is life. These women should realistically seek a husband and not take advantage of the condition of these men. when we talk about this issue we make the mistake of sometimes making the mistake of making the black guy the bad guy. Very stereotypical. Many black guys live to hump and still end up with nothing. no one talks about that. To some women, they're just the big black rock-hard you know what.

Afro-man. said...

part-three
I live in a predominantly white area. I go to bars, parks, libraries and clubs and i like the people i meet there. i know there is racism and rubbish talk as a result of racism but i have related with so many nice white people that i have no reason to hate. After-all in my country there is tribalism. i am from southern Nigeria and there is a lot of stress that comes with trying to marry a northern Nigerian woman because i am not Muslim or Hausa tribe. Yet i have always liked northern Nigerian women. LOL Is it not the same thing? Man we're all just chatting please.!!!!!!!
As for me, i will marry where i find love and she does not have be black. Just looking at the statistics only shows that there are less black women abroad than in Africa, why are people still finding horrible reasons to account for the increase in interracial marriage when we have few black women to pick a wife from? There is a lot of love involved in interracial marriage. And if marrying your foreign wife will give you a second passport, well more reasons to love her more. And the more success you've achieved as a man because you've used ones stone to kill two birds - love and legitimacy.
the chances of black girl with a British passport marrying a black guy without one is harder when compared to the chances of the European white woman. fact! people that have rubbish to say about interracial marriage have an agenda or a pain turned hate they want the rest of the world
to share but people like me cant be influenced by this rubbish.

Anonymous said...

Nigerians are extremely arrogant and offensive. even if you show respect towards them. i will never deal with any nigerian again in my life. why don't they stay in their country and stop bothering us Europeans once and for all. they are not welcome in my country at all. just go nigers!

Anonymous said...

As a Black American who lived in Germany for 20 years I saw exactly what the author saw. Lots of African Immigrants who used and abused European women. But keep in mind its the same with the Asian women and Hispanics who marry Americans, they want the pay check. Theres always more crap than toilet paper wake up people!! And yes yes theres also European women of little means who marry other cultures to get out of their poverty. I've been married to my European wife of 12 years because she is an intelligent,educated lively and lovely woman who has a JOB and shows mutual respect sharing 50/50 as a partner in a lifetime journey, not because of BJs or as a sex toy only because she's a woman. If she had been Asian, Red, Black, Arab or green I still would've married her because she is who she is. So stay in your castle behind your moat in seclusion, while the world keeps moving.

Oh and for the nutless idiot who used the N word. It describes you to a T.

Anonymous said...

There are blacks who believe that when you married white woman or date white woman you achived higher social status,higher level of achivement.That means you don't love your own race somwhere deep inside of yourself you are not happy with who you are you are full of complex so you need to married white woman to raise your status. It is not a joke there are black mans like this,It is very strange love you always see one way but you never see the other way around you always see black man and white woman but it is very rare that you see the other way around. I live in Florida that is full of blacks and very few times it is very rare case that you will see white man and black woman.That is strange love.There are white girls who wants to rebel against parents and society so they date only black guys. But other than that blacks are full of HIV,bigest number of crimes and many of them do not like to work. It is sad but is true.Some people do fall in love can't blame them. White people are only 8% left in the world based on united nations statistics and on top of that we need plus interacial marriges. White race is the only race that don't have a right for her racial territory everybody else do Asia will 90% always be Asia.Africa will 90% always be Africa.India will 90 always be India.But all countries that are build by whites are forced to mass immigration.Europe,Austraila,New Zeland,USA,Canada and even Russia is starting to get involved and on the Top of that we need interacial marriges. When our race become extinct our children become minority everybody will get away with hurting a white person our history will be deleted like we never existed. Good luck

I APOLOGISE FOR MY GRAMMAR ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE. I AM LEAVING ANYWAY I HOPE I OPEN EYES TO SOMEONE I WANT WASTE MY TIME ON THIS MESSAGE BOARD BEACUSE PEOPLE ARE SO IGNORANT ANYWAY.

goodgirl said...

Hm!All the generalizations are dangerous! But,indeed, most of nigerians men are desperate and that's why they can do anything for a better status!Sad,because playing with people's life shouldn't be an option! But,everybody will suffer the consequences of their actions sooner or later! God is above!

soph said...

afro-man...
good on you for sticking up for your race.
i have a nigerian boyfriend, and he lives in India, his fooballng profession has already taken him there.
it told him when we got together that if he wanted to make it to England, he would have to though football, get signed by a team and get a visa because i would not be a greencard for him. I flatly told him this, that i loved him and wanted him to be in this country so we can be together properly, but that i would not agree to any kind of marriage until we had been together for a long time and i had finished my studies, possibly in the future, as you would consider with any serious relationship, regardless of race.
I agree, there is a general consensus about Nigerian men, the way they treat their wives and the reasons they marry, but this is not all completely true. I spent alot of time in India with a large group of Nigerians and they all had different attitudes towards white women.
Afro-man, you are right, alot of them loved the fact that i was open, friendly, nice and talkative. Generally just honest and a lot of fun. They seemed taken aback by this almost as if they had never encountered it before.
But regarding the whole weight issue, i think some of them have no problem commenting on your weight, if you should lose some, or if you have put some on. In that way it think Nigerian men are becoming much more westernised. Being a different race of course there are different cultures.
It angers me when people assume a Nigerian man marries a white woman for money and/or is a drug dealer. OPEN YOUR EYES. Do people have no idea how marrow minded this makes them sound. You’ll find most of the people making these comments have never actually had interaction with a Nigerian or bothered to get to know any of them.
And to be honest, who wouldn’t want to make a better way for themselves in life. I was in awe of their attitudes to the way the Indian people treated them – like shit basically- and when i asked them why they said because India offered more opportunities than their home country. I think this is an honourable thing, to want to be the best you possibly can in life, and sadly we are in a world where this is only possible if you live in the upper hemisphere.
It is only human nature for people to use other people shamelessly for their advantage, such as people marrying to get a visa in the UK. But this happens in every race, not just Nigerians, and more fool those who let it happen to them! You all need to open your eyes too.

soph said...

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Anonymous said...

wow..It´s late and therefor had to read some words twice.. jeez, never read such crap in my life. I´m a Belgian woman living in the Netherlands for over 10 years, moved there´cause of my love..yep my nigerian man. nope he did not marry me because of papers, money or wathever other idiotic reason you named here..forgot to tell you we´re not married at all..and hey we´re still together, happily with our lovely daughter. He´s not my first nigerian partner, yeah I had a few.. but none ever treathed me bad, used me and dumped me for whatever reason.. I never spent excess money on any of them, took a loan, married them and then divorced.. Many of my friends have dated Nigerian or other African men and most of them are still together, with kids, married or not. some where unlucky and got screwed..but hey that happens in a lot of relationships, interracial or not. I can´t deny that some men of foreign nationality do come to Europe or the States looking for pali..but shit happens. That does´nt mean all Nigerian men do so. Sometimes I don´t even blame Nigerian men running away from their white women, specially in Holland..they are so bossy and controlling even a white man would run off.. Like Yasmeen I work with refugees for over 15 years as a lawyer and yeah I know most of these stories, but what she wrote is utterly ridiculous.Stop generalization. not all Turkish men run around with knives, not all Arab men are suicide bombers, not all Jewish men make love through a hole in a bedsheet.. not all Nigerian men marry white women for another reason but love. greetz from Holland!

Anonymous said...

thank you. refreshing to hear someone talk like that, conratulations on your steady relationship and beautiful daughter

Anonymous said...

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i wonder why some one these white idiots ladies thinks all nigerians are thesame!!!!! if u check out the guys who do these thing she stated above,most are married to ladies as 2ce as their age and all they need is the paper and the money.i guess she is older than the guy she had the problem with cos she wanted to try the black dick,though some nigerian guys are stupid for doing that and i will NEVER justify their action but for her to conclude that all nigerian guys do that is a slap to me as a person cos am married to a white lady and she was in nigerian to meet my families. so please b4 u say something about us do ur proper research.

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Bobby Smith said...

Wow - for some reason interracial marriages/relationships still manage to upset people. Why? We live in the 21st Century. It is entirely up to the individual whom they decide to marry/procreate with. Writing as someone who has enjoyed an interracial marriage for 12 years - I am an Englishman, whilst my wife is a Yoruba Nigerian - I can only speak of them in a positive way. My wife and I (not to mention our families and friends) have learned so much about English and Yoruba culture - it has been a genuine voyage of discovery for all involved. Sadly, most people who write about mixed marriages tend to rely on hearsay, myth and stereotype, rather than checking their facts. Incidentally, my wife and I wrote of our experiences in a book entitled: One Love Two Colours: The unlikely marriage of a Punk Rocker & his African Queen. You can see more about it via our www.amazon.co.uk listing. Thanks.

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Digare Ahmed said...

Hello,
All am to say is that Extreme love and Extreme hatred is enough to send anyone mad love felt for G-d is the perfect love I do believe in real love and please one shouldn't have to generalized that all Nigerians marry just because they wanna live in EU or US some of those really do and some doesn't I knew of the Nigerian tribe that marry mostly their tribe those Hausa tribe and those of Peuls. Whatever might be the case love has no specific language it is blind totally blind has nothing do with race, or culture sometimes not all the times. I bet some constitutional laws need to be amend to curve with such problem in EU in that case one an understand who there true love ones are.

Thanks and G-d bless

Digare Ahmed said...

The luckiest one who walked the earth is he who finds true love, love wouldn't hundred percent safe on earth wherever you look there threats around, ranging from death, to departure

And Again Thanks

israelthestoryteller said...

My dear love is where you find it .
Sometimes it is because the Nigerian has so many failed attempts to win the heart of his prospect hence if a decent white girl comes along the way he goes for it with grace.

most of the time white grils let you know how they feel about you from day 1 of your meeting them
they don't mess about,they either like you or they don't.

You are attracted to what you think you do not have and what appears glamorous,hence there is a inter-link between the two parties,black people are blessed with an athletic physique most of the time,black people have a high degree of emotional intensity and depth which makes them excel in the terrains of freedom if they postively harness there potential,relatively black men could be very resilient,rugged and patient ,whites have a way of picking on possibiliites and developing them ,they also have curiousity for blacks that is infinite,if a white girl is good she could be wonderful if a white girl is bad she could be demonic so careful.
above of all i think it is usually a case of two different people who truely know they are different but are willing to harness their differences for good and God really honours that if the parties are true to themselves .
There is the believe that the black guy may do very well if he has a european woman.
There is also glamour and glorification attached to such unions on the social circuit,both parties have unlimited access to areas that may be restricted .

Digare Ahmed said...

Gold...
Indeed an excellent remark I like that. Love itself is as good as gold sometimes lol no matter what,s the question love is the answer.

Thanks

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I can say that the reasons above written are true,to some extent.I have seen lot of cases like that and many women left behind to face the consequences of their actions.I am not talking only about document and marriage issues,but also about Nigerian men and relationships outside of immigration(cheating and lies.)Not in a million years have i expected that God would prove to me,in my own case,that there ARE some good nigerians left.In my early teens, i met a nigerian man who had troubled past and a child with nigerian woman with whom he had no relationship,but just one night stand in his college days.He was a decade older than me and could have used me in all possible ways, but he hasn't.He came to Europe in search of better life and to try and change himself.I knew all the good,bad and ugly things about him from day 1 and i was there to help him pull through all immigration troubles and other ones too.I,myself am from Eastern Europe and had no passport that he could use me for. Our families opposed to us,especially his,particularly when i could not bear him a child straight away when they wanted me to.He stood up to everyone,including his cloest family, and we married when he had his immigration status sorted out.Just after him,i sorted out mine too.At the end,we adopted children,but God also blessed us with biological ones too.To this day,we are very strong and i can only say that not all nigerian men are same.Many are users and will do anything to make their life better,not looking at consequences,but let me tell you,at least 1 % of them are good and i had luck to find one good one.

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Ann said...

Actually this is false. African female immigrants are more likely to date and marry interracial than African men.

http://www.sociology.ohio-state.edu/zcq/publications/ssr-qianlichter.pdf

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I am a Ugandan and find white women very attractive not because they have money and not that if I made a decision to marry one , it will be because of paper.
I tell God made man and woman in his own way and as said beauty lies in the hands of the beholder. We shall never know what causes those who go for racial marriage do so but we can appreciate that they have finally seen beyond their skins and chose a lifetime committement that fulfills their dreams. We will never know why people deviorce but that is what we have to leave with.
For the lady who claims brothers fro Uni are marrying because of paper, I find that really amazing. I really think that one of these is actually your preferred choice of a husband and because you are about to loose him, then you feel his marrying because of other things other than true love. My advise, if you really love him, tell him before he committee and see if he really cared for you or forever hold your peace.

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you guys can say whatever you like .I personally have been married to african girl too here , but i found out that , to be free from their snare, to live freely and to love freely , a white woman will be ok. so i went for that , and i am still living with my oyibo for 25 years now , and with two kids that are graduates . the point am trying to make is , if you "oyibo" mingle with a stark illitrate african, only heaven will help you . but if you meet the good ones , you will never regret your marriage. it is a matter of two souls that are open to each other . ok?

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I've seen it too much in the area i live in but hope tat one day what goes around comes around.....I know some people might think it generalising but it does happen a lot. I'm not saying all Nigerian men are like that but I must say once I am separated from this one I doubt I will ever have anything to do with Nigerians again, that includes the women also because they the ones I trsuted and befriended showed that they are just as devious as the men..........Sorry if this offends some of you but its how I feel and I must say i put a lot of time and effort into getting to know these people and really thought i had wonderful friends but I was disappointed, and hese are poeple who go to church every sunday and pray for people to treat them as they would like to be treated and they come out of church and become hypocrites for the week until the following sunday when they go back to pray again....its digusting!!!!

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I am dating a Nigerian man for 1 year now. He is great in every aspect, except that communication issue that was mentioned in the previous comments. When he has a problem, he just shys away. I think he wants me to see him "strong" and "cool"... i guess this is not because of the fact that he is Nigerian, that's just how he is. The strange thing (based on all you comments) is that he doesn't want to live here (i'm from Greece), his family is in the UK, but he doesn't want to live there either. What he offers me is to get married and go live in Nigeria (Abudja). And he really means it.

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Yeah. I believe there is a lot of truth to what this woman is saying. Especially among Yoruba men for some reason, I don't know why. And they marry the white women for those benefits and then treat them like garbage. They even do it to the black American women. I know a guy who is half Yoruba-half black American and he is so bitter towards his dad for leaving his mother for a 9ja woman. He said, "They always go back to the Nigerian women." I know a kid, Deji, who is half 9ja-half white American. Same problem. I am an bi-racial American who actually visited Nigeria and some of those men. When they talk to me, I get the feeling that they do not see me as human. They see me as a ticket out or something like that. There was definitely an Igbo guy even who I got that feeling from.
There were a few guys who I suspected sincerity from. I like 9ja men (and 9ja clothes, 9ja style, 9ja food, 9ja pride, 9ja culture, 9ja state of mind), but it is really difficult to know who is sincere and who's not. I guess you just have to wait and see. I think even Nigerian girls need to beware but honestly, when it comes to dating, us oyibos are not as smart as the Nigerian women. I felt like I got a lot smarter about dating from living in Nigeria, because you really learn so much so quickly. Those guys are definitely more challenging that the guys here in the US.

Nicole said...

Want to add something. Because I would not mind marrying a Nigerian (I like the 9ja style) but do realize that some can be insincere I tell them several things just to weed out the bad ones:
1. I tell them that I am black in my country (although they don't believe me) and black people in the US are treated similarly to the way Hausas are treated in Nigeria. I go on and on about slavery, the housing agreement after World War II that made whites wealthier on average than blacks, the way the Tea Partiers treat Obama, the black male incarceration rate.
2. I tell them that if my husband cheats on me I will divorce him because in the Bible, Jesus says that divorce will make a woman an adulterer except in cases of unfaithfulness. Matthew 19:9

Once I tell them that, the insincere ones usually leave me alone. At the same time, if he wants a visa for the education those things do not matter.

I also want to say that the half-Yoruba-half-black American guy I was telling you about in the previous post actually told me that his dad did not marry his mom for the papers but he still treated her like crap and left her for a Nigerian woman.

If I marry a Nigerian man, it will because the Holy Spirit approves and demands the marriage, because I can trust the Holy Spirit. Whoever I marry the man shall be God fearing and a true, sincere Christian. I say this not to discriminate. I love my Muslim brothers and sisters, but I must not be unevenly yoked with a non-believer.

I do however think that it is true that some of the most wicked Nigerians (and people in general) can be the ones that go to church every Sunday and even those that go everyday. But as they say in Nigeria, "The Devil can read the Bible." That is why true and sincere Christians must be discern the spirits and trust the Holy Spirit. They should also not be prideful because they too can fall from righteousness.

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I know I'm 5 yrs too late but this post is both hilarious and insulting at the same time. The call to reign curses on poor (and very likely ignorant) Yasmeen's head is hilarious! Lol. The woman simply has not met the many good Nigerian men out there who have positive reasons for choosing to be with non-black women. Hmmm, I suppose it's a bit sad because it's unfair to the good Nigerian men who 'just happen' to be with white women.

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wow, first of all can i say that i have never read so much RACISM, LACK OF KNOWLEDGE, HATE, AND RUDENESS, all in one day before, i think this woman is very wrong indeed with what she has said, and i think its maybe her herself that has maybe been scorned, but its wrong to judge every man in the same way, as many of you said it does happen and its them few that spoil others, i think people should just live there lives to be as happy as you can make it, and if that means dating black white pink or yellow for that matter, no one else should judge, but i will say one thing i am in a relationship with a nigerian man from lagos, and we have been together for 10 years and counting and i have loved every minute of my time with him and look forward to every minute more, i love going to lagos with him to see my inlaws sisters brothers etc, and i welcome them into my homme also, i am made very welcome always, so this woman needs to get off her high horse that she rode in on and take a chill pill or something,

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That idiota of a person never mentioned that most of those girls who flock around the Black people are doing so because they want that Chocolate baby which they know too well that they wont allow to live their country for that of the father. Who tells this fool that the white women are not after the black people because of their money and above all, for the sex satisfaction which no white man can give. All these women who are not willing to spend 1 hour stroking the PENIS of a white man when they know that they can get on with a quick sex with the ever ready for action of a black man. What makes her say stupid things against the black man when they the white women are the one running after these guys because of their want for sex.

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